Sensei has nothing left to teach me, since my problem is me and my desire to teach. The monologue at the end of class was about being ‘0′ as a number and numeral: rather than an actual number. Mushin or somesuch, of readiness.

Sensei has nothing left to teach me, since my problem is me and my desire to teach. The monologue at the end of class was about being ‘0′ as a number and numeral: rather than an actual number. Mushin or somesuch, of readiness.

I had a vague chance to make the last hour hour or less of practice, but decided against it. Somehow, there was enough to do just unwinding at home, and I was stone tired. Still, a break is nice even though it now feels like a longer break, after a long stretch of continual practices I won’t see again until, oh, June.

Today was more of the sweaty same: Sensei scored a good men-ippon on me, I managed to hit my classic knm on my nemesis, and some half-decent kiriotoshi, but not enough to please Sensei–almost nothing does.

Sensei had two great stories last night that I forgot to recount:

First, to explain kiseme, he invokes getting a letter from the IRS–flinch backwards, “I don’t want to open this!!!”

Second, and more pleasantly, when Sensei was younger he received many love letters from women–girls–which means that he would get this letter, which just seeing it would make him feel good, sometimes it even smelled good before he opened it. It is this level of control of others that you must achieve!

Amazing how many different ways I can get the same advice. Judging by how I look in the mirror though, I think my issues come out of jigeiko, so it’s a question of the application of the kihon in kendo, while trying to juggle all of the different pieces of advice I get from just Sensei: “too late”–”don’t rush”; “do kihon”–”attack smaller”. But I do hear repeatedly that I need to attack more smoothly and not downwardly, rigid after an attack, not ready to keep going. So in that sense…

It’s getting old and I admit that today I felt frustrated with multiple partners for stupid reasons, and I need to get a grip. Sure, I hear the same thing everytime from Sensei, but who should I be mad at?

More suburi, suburi, suburi! Shugyo!

I’m told yet again that I’m too consistent, and thankfully I can look up the complaints before–I need more variety, seme, and relaxation. Hrmm… Like I know, but still can’t do!

Substantially lower turnout than the past two Sundays, and a return to the Sunday Special, with not very good results from my keiko, the comments varying from the need to move my body more, the need not to bend back-knee and dodge while using more small waza, and the attempt to try various different vectors, even if center is best.

It’s quite unfortunate that the horrible sempai passed sandan because now he’s taken it upon himself to provide all sorts of unsolicited advice and solicitousness, which is quite unwelcome given my own politics and his impolitic insinuations that I had better hang out more after the dojo if I, too, want to pass sandan on the first try, which is rather ridiculous and almost makes me want to find another dojo though that’s only after Sensei passes.